Update 2: 100 Moar Photos Of Paris Roxanne
Every so often I stumble upon a girl that someone claims is “The New Angie Varona,” and for obvious reasons Paris Roxanne has now been added to that roster. I have seen her around Tumblr a few times, but it wasn’t until I noticed she was Chive-spotted (#17) that I started paying attention to this 22-year-old Orange County native (October 11, 1990).
Not too much else is known about her, other than that she fits the “New Angie” profile, she’s a San Francisco Giants fan, there are a bunch of fake Facebook accounts out there under the name Paris Roxanne and Marine Camillia, the latter of which has caused the interweb to wonder which one is her real name. Strangely, she’s also linked to the name “ParisNCasey” where you’ll find photos of her and some douchebag. Weird.
She likes baseball (go Giants!), comic books, dubstep and taking photos of herself, so I’m already half in love, but it’s essentially all for naught, because Paris is madly in love with San Francisco Giants pitcher Tim Lincecum, who is allegedly the d-bag she’s seen with in those photos and is also not really a douchebag at all (he smokes weed and wins Cy Young awards). I gathered all that from a combination of the photos, Paris’ posts on his fanpage here, here and here (making this her real Facebook account), as well as this Twitition she made to get a date with him a few years ago. Maybe she finally stalked him into submission! Who knows?
There’s a Facebook fanpage for Paris that she allegedly admins with some others (the real account has posted on the page), but other than that we’ll just have to wait and see if she launches a modeling/acting career out of this, or convinces Lincecum to marry her. Only time will tell, but until then we have these photons!
Filed Under: Women & Relationships
About the Author: NateBlack is doin pretty good as far as geniuses go. Arrogant, insightful, and humble, Nate possesses one of the most dangerous minds of our generation. Stay tuned for More News, Re-Posts, and Originals from this modern day scholar. *If any of you are interested in writing for LDU contact 'Nate Black' via Facebook or firstname.lastname@example.org*